CRASH CLASSES FOR LOOTING THE PUBLIC

Do not be shocked to see such advertisements some day in news papers

GOVT OF BANANA REPUBLIC

Ministry of Corruption and Scams

            CWG House, 2G Road, Adarsha Nagar, Coalgategram 420420

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CRASH CLASSES FOR LOOTING THE PUBLIC

It has come to light that only politicians, govt servants, their relatives and friends are getting benefits of frauds, scams, big scale corruption, public loot and such other white collar lucrative business activities, With a view to enrich other common citizens and alleviate large scale poverty, Govt has decided to conduct one month crash courses to develop and sharpen skills of common youths upto 40 years of age, in such profitable ventures. Govt desires to democratize art of looting the country in this Republic, which other countries will emulate in future.

In view of above decision, sealed tenders are invited from institutes, colleges, universities [including deemed one], autonomous bodies in field of education, NGOs to conduct one month crash courses all over country. Broad conditions are as under:

1. Applicant should have political support and proven track record in corruption and such lucrative business activities [including mining, games, air, water, land, health].

2. They should have visiting faculties who have been punished or charged for such lucrative activities by competent courts.

3. They should have one guest faculty per week, who is in jail for undertaking such profitable ventures.

4. They should not charge fee more than 5.00 lakhs for the course, 50% of which will have to be deposited in party fund account in a swiss bank.

5. There will not be any caste reservation in admission and will be open to all youths who want to start such enterprise to develop economy of this Republic.

6. Relatives of certified or charged corrupt politicians, officers, [including their blood relatives and in-laws] and their business associates and employees will not be eligible for such course, as they already have such expertise upto post graduation level.

7. Applicants should guarantee skill enrichment to the extent that students after successful completion of course and passing the exam, should be in a position to effectively conceive, plan, execute and escape being caught by social activists for business up to Rs.5.00 crores per year.

8. Course material and teaching methodology will be developed by concerned applicants without any help from Ministry. Two real case studies are must.

9. Exams will be conducted by “Institute of Scams and Corruption Research” free of charge. Certificates will be signed by Minister of Scams of this Govt with his photo.

Tender forms and detailed terms and conditions are at website www.gbr.gov.com.

Last date for submission of tender documents: 31-12-2012 by 04.00 pm

Director [Employment and Skill Development] 
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This piece is a work of fiction intended to bring a smile to your face. It bears no connection to events and characters in real life.

Authored by J. P. Shah, Junagadh Gujarat  jpshah50@yahoo.co.in          151012