Do not be shocked to see such advertisements some day in
news papers
GOVT OF BANANA REPUBLIC
Ministry of Corruption and Scams
CWG House, 2G Road
____________________________________________________________________
Due to growing risks in present anti-corruption/scam
situation and in the interest of common citizens of this republic, Govt have
decided to provide insurance cover to “poor and patriotic” corrupt politicians
and officers against risk of being exposed, caught and punished for indulging
into corruption and scams.
The ministry invites sealed tenders
from insurance companies from countries ranked as one of the top 50 corrupt
countries in the world by TI for insurance cover broadly described as under:
Risks to be covered: 1. Caught red-handed 2.
Disproportionate assets raids, 3. Arrest for corruption, 4. Suspension from
service, 5. Dismissal from service, 6.
Raids and investigation by prime investigating agencies, 7. Court or Lokayukta intervention,
8. Legal expenses to prolong court
cases and escape punishment till natural death. 9. Loss of political business. 10 One day
to life time jail due to corruption. 11
Death due to shock of punishment under anti-corruption laws, 12. Loss of reputation
in society and country 13 Bribes to be paid to investigating agencies [including
political handlers] for diluting the cases, 14 Expenses for managing media. 15.
Other covers that Insurance companies may innovate for the benefit of poor corrupt
citizens.
Range of covers:
“Petty” corruption upto 100 Lakh
Crores
Medium value corruption from 101
Lakh Crores to 1000 lakh Crores
High value corruption for any amount
above 1000 lakh Crores
Life time pension and family pension
to those who are jailed for life time or die due to corrupt practices and whose
corrupt assets are confiscated by courts.
Premium: Govt will pay 50% annual or life
time premium from govt exchequer as welfare initiative and rest 50% will be
borne by politicians and officers from corrupt money amassed so far. Insurance
companies will pass on corrupt part of premium to party in power in cash or
kind or in swiss bank accounts.
Private Citizens: Insurance companies will be free
to sell such policies to private citizens also who become part of corruption
and scams. However, Govt have no funds to pay premiums for such poor citizens
of the republic.
Tender forms and detailed terms and
conditions are available at e-tender site of this govt -- www.mcs.gobr.com
___________________________________________________________________
This piece is a work of fiction
intended to bring a smile to your face. It bears no connection to events and
characters in real life.
Authored by J. P. Shah, Junagadh
Gujarat jpshah50@yahoo.co.in 09102012
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